(off-topic): I'm very sorry if this is not in the right forum - I'm extremely tired right now (and it's very late, too), I also had no chance to read the rules - and I can't seem to find them - but I'm definitely not new to messageboards...
BTW: Sorry about my english - I live in Poland, where not many ppl speak any foreign languages...

Ok, back on topic... I heard about LDing a looong time ago - it'll be over a year by now - I read a lot of stuff on that subject, and despite the time that has passed, I had none (well, almost none) success... mostly due to lack of motivation, and my other real life problems...

In my entire life, I only had maybe 2 minutes total of LDs - in about 4 or 5 dreams (some of these weren't even recorded by me, and my old dreamdiary has been lost in a... small accident with my other comp , and it was all a looong time ago) - anyway, this got me [almost] nowhere, but it's mostly - if not completely - my own fault, and now I could seriously use your help...

But first, I guess I got to tell ya a few facts about me and my life that are (or at least may be) important in this case:
- some time ago I found my life totally pointless (don't ask how...), and I've had suicidal thoughts ever since that - my life's sorta screwed... by me [and you wondered how I got the idea for my nick... now u know...]
- I'm the lazy one - a ton of things either await doing, or is only partially completed, and so far I failed to overcome this...
- while I know that LDs aren't by any means an escape from reality, I have a strong feeling that I subconsciously assume otherwise...
- I'm quite forgetful... and that spells disaster when it comes to doing RCs... (esp. when I'm in school, or otherwise engaged in some activity...)
- apparently I'm totally 'blind' to all unusual things around me - I remember countless times when I was doing something totally out of ordinary in my dream, and failed to notice that it's not something I'd ever do in my real life...
- my dream recall ain't best either - actually, it's quite horrible...
- the only thing that has actually IMPROVED since my last failed attempts is that now my motivation is much better... but still apparently not enough...

I'm not going to bore you any more by telling how badly my life is screwed, as it's the wrong time and place to do that... I just expect some hints... that would be very appreciated.