My old topic got drowned amongst all the other, more illustrious topics, so I though I'd make a new one. This one a bit less organized, with me just posting random writings as I, well, write them. Starting with this rather dark bit of rambling that I just spouted into Notepad during commercial breaks.

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These four walls grow ever closer, it seems, surrounding my very soul in a glass box, enclosing it from the hardships without. Meant to protect, but all it does is hurt more. Cold envelopes me, seeping into my very core, disabling all but the basest of emotion. Constricting the flow of feeling, holding it all within. Why does it do this to me? Why must my mind shrink into itself to free itself from its bonds? I want to expand! To be free from this cage of ice. I want to live, not feel as if I am dying little by little, my soul a compacted ball of hot, raw passion while the rest of me feels naught. The rest of me is cold, unfeeling, discompassionate. Lost in a sea of endless discontent, and not caring one whit.

Having deserted all compassion, all caring, all empathy and all sense of normality to this empty shell of nothingness. It feels like I'm drowning. Drowning in water that does not exist.Water no more real than my dreams. I am haunted in my dreams, too. The emotion that I do not feel in waking life taunts me in my dreams, faintly beckoning, always just out of reach. I cannot obtain that which I seek. I fear I am lost. I fear all is lost. What is life without love, without happiness, without loathing, without envy, without any emotion at all, whether positive of negative. Cold is all I experience. Endless cold. I am lost.

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No, I don't know what the heck that even was...