# Lucid Dreaming > Dream Control >  >  How not to have sex?

## PaddyMcNasty

Help! I'm a monster, I can't stop myself.

I keep ruining my LDs by trying to have sex. Every time I try it wakes me up. My libido is too powerful, even last night when I decided if I went lucid I would go flying and avoid sex, I did it anyway and woke myself up.

Maybe if I had more sex in real life, but girls don't seem to appreciate Star Wars based chat up lines. Girls are weird.

Anyone else any experience, and overcome this?

Cheers
Paddy

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## slayer

Unfortunately, I don't know how to overcome this. The only thing I can think of to do is to try and remember what it is that you want to do in an LD instead of having sex.





> Maybe if I had more sex in real life, but girls don't seem to appreciate Star Wars based chat up lines. Girls are weird.



LOL

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## guitarboy

When you your falling asleep, either repeat one of these lines
"I will lucid dream about [whatever]"
Or
"I will not have lucid sex"
Though that may induce it.

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## Higurashi

> Help! I'm a monster, I can't stop myself.



Lol  ::rolleyes:: 

I agree with guitarboy. Set intentions before you go to sleep by way of mantras or autosuggestion.

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## PaddyMcNasty

Thanks for the feedback. I've been doing WBTB so I will try the mantra thing when I get up tomorrow morning and report back.

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## yuriythebest

yeah I have the same issue. one of my dreamgoals is
"talk to (female) DC's without molesting them [ ] "

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## Rainman

> "I will not have lucid sex"



Yeah, that will actually cause him to think about it more. The subconscious doesn't hear negatives, because "not" doing something isn't an action. It is the implied absence of an action, but the subconscious doesn't understand implications, therefore what it hears is "I will have lucid sex."

How about saying something like "I really love to fly. I can't wait to fly. Flying is so fun. I can't wait to have superpowers, superpowers are so fun." etc. Or you could just learn how to control your dreams better so you can have so much sex you'll get bored of it.

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## hellohihello

This might help.
http://www.dreamviews.com/community/...l+distractions

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## Techno

Simple. Don't put your dream penis in her dream vagina. Avoid the dream vagina at all costs. Keep your dream penis in your dream pants at all costs.

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## CRAZY BONE

Yeah I'm the same way. However, I don't try very hard to stop, I just learned how to do it without waking up as the result of a lot of practice. 

Personally, if having sex is what you want to do most during your LD, then go for it. I mean, doing what you want is what LDs are all about. However, I understand how they tend to end your lucidity so that's not good. You shouldn't feel like you're wasting your LDs if you always spend them having sex, that's what the majority of my LDs are all about. Personally, out of all the fun things I have done in LDs, sex is still the best thing.

So you can either sacrifice a lot of your LDs to get your practice in, or you work around the extreme desire and try to focus on other things. I don't know how frequently you have LDs, but if you don't have them very often, I would suggest not trying to master LD sex yet since it ruin a lot of your LDs.

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## nobodycares

Sex is boring.  When can you fly to other planets and destroy shit using fire from your fingers?

Or detonate a nuclear bomb and live through it?

These are the types of things I want to do when I become lucid.  Forget sex, how boring.

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## Dash

I don't really know how much I can help here, but have you tried, doing you-know-what before bed?

As for in the dream, you're probably just not getting lucid enough. With more practice, you'll be able to avoid the distractions. Also look at the "avoiding sexual distractions" Tut on here.

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## Mzzkc

Whatever you do, don't *imagine*, or even *consider*, the possibility of *razor sharp teeth* or other *sharp metal pointy bits* nestled inside her *vagina!* It could end in *horrible* and *grotesque  lacerations* of your dream penis. On the other hand, an experience like that could solve your problem *forever*.

I love doing that. ^.^

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## hellohihello

> Whatever you do, don't *imagine*, or even *consider*, the possibility of *razor sharp teeth* or other *sharp metal pointy bits* nestled inside her *vagina!* It could end in *horrible* and *grotesque  lacerations* of your dream penis. On the other hand, an experience like that could solve your problem *forever*.
> 
> I love doing that. ^.^



Oh my goodness, that mental image was so full of win. Thank you...

Now you can definitely use this in your lucids to stop having sex.

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## guitarboy

> Whatever you do, don't *imagine*, or even *consider*, the possibility of *razor sharp teeth* or other *sharp metal pointy bits* nestled inside her *vagina!* It could end in *horrible* and *grotesque  lacerations* of your dream penis. On the other hand, an experience like that could solve your problem *forever*.
> 
> I love doing that. ^.^



It's a risk 

I'll have to take.

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## Jimmehboi

Masta-bait before bed n tingz blad.

Probably about right cause then you wouldn't be so charged before you sleep.

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## PaddyMcNasty

Sorry if you're awaiting the outcome of this, but no lucids so far. Might try a WILD after breakfast but I've not mastered it yet so no promises.





> So you can either sacrifice a lot of your LDs to get your practice in, or you work around the extreme desire and try to focus on other things. I don't know how frequently you have LDs, but if you don't have them very often, I would suggest not trying to master LD sex yet since it ruin a lot of your LDs.



About once a week just now. Don't get me wrong, I certainly intend to use my LDs for it at some point, but I want to put it off for a bit and concentrate on doing some things I can do.





> This might help.
> http://www.dreamviews.com/community/...l+distractions



Good shout.





> Whatever you do, don't *imagine*, or even *consider*, the possibility of *razor sharp teeth* or other *sharp metal pointy bits* nestled inside her *vagina!* It could end in *horrible* and *grotesque  lacerations* of your dream penis. On the other hand, an experience like that could solve your problem *forever*.
> 
> I love doing that. ^.^



Could be a bad Matrix moment.

"I thought it wasn't real"

"Your brain makes it real."

 ::shock:: 





> As for in the dream, you're probably just not getting lucid enough.



May be right. I'll also try to ground myself more in the dream next time.





> I don't really know how much I can help here, but have you tried, doing you-know-what before bed?







> Masta-bait before bed n tingz blad.



Most people to try to convince me to masturbate at once in my life so far.  ::D: 

Anyone else?

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## ChaybaChayba

Simply turn all the female DC's into your mom or your sister. Problem solved!  ::D:

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## hellohihello

> Simply turn all the female DC's into your mom or your sister. Problem solved!



Or Grandma!

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## mrdeano

> Help! I'm a monster, I 
> 
> Maybe if I had more sex in real life, but girls don't seem to appreciate Star Wars based chat up lines. Girls are weird.



Hahaha!


Anyways, you must set you intentions before you fall asleep and make them very clear. Repeat in your head something like.
'I will not have sex in my Lucid Dream, I will ___'

I am sure you can overcome this eventually.

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## DarkLucideity

WILLPOWER. And fap irl.

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## Mzzkc

> Hahaha!
> 
> 
> Anyways, you must set you intentions before you fall asleep and make them very clear. Repeat in your head something like.
> 'I will not have sex in my Lucid Dream, I will ___'
> 
> I am sure you can overcome this eventually.



That first part of that phrase won't work. I think we've been over this. I even posted a disgustingly exaggerated example to drive the point home. ^.^

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## KingYoshi

All the other suggestions may work, but they would take will power and hard-er work. It seems pointless when all you have to do is masturbate before bed. Its easy, lol.

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## Hukif

Well, if most suggestions use willpower, then just use raw willpower for not to, that has worked for me so far.

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## Mzzkc

> Well, if most suggestions use willpower, then just use raw willpower for not to, that has worked for me so far.



Wait. . . 

Which one inherits the other?

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## Hukif

Ah... willpower to techniques? But since just telling myself not to while lucid works for me, I suggested that, don't mind anything else <.<

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## Ethereal

Heh, what a terrible thing to stop  :wink2: . I guess the trick is to just maintain your lucidity. Besides, there's nothing to say you can't have sex mid-flight/mid-destruction of the earth.

Just be careful with the 'fire-from-fingertips' on your dreamgirl.

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## mrdeano

I am still a Lucid Virgin  ::content::

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## panta-rei

A thing I call "Self-control."

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## guitarboy

> I am still a Lucid Virgin



You crazy bastard!
I just got a new method. I was about to have lucid sex last night, but I was trying the task(which I failed) and I imagined the girl had a penis. It worked, but I think it shocked me and I woke up.

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## Lucid fanatic

hookers



JK

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## Enlightenment

The only advice I can give is, just don't do it! lol.

Sorry I can't be of more help. Just try and focus on something else  :wink2:

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## Ready4Fajir

Hi,

one important thing: DONT have negative thoughts, such as "I will not have ***" - it wont work, since your mind cant really cope with negating stuff - instead of NOT doing the thing you want to avoid, you'll definitely do the stuff u want to avoid! So the way to go, is to have positive thoughts, which keep you too busy to do the stuff you dont want. Such as: " I am so satisfied already" or whatever you can think of  :smiley:  .

Cheers,
Ready4Fajir

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## ohzmat

i hope this is a joke,
:p

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## spockman

Integrate them. Example, one time I had an intense action lucid. After my friends and I killed the first wave of enemies with insane gunplay we took a quick intermission to all have sex. Then we went back to killing more guys, this time with our hands. After that, we had sex again. Once you learn to lengthen your lucids, you won't have this problem. You can have sex AND complete goals.

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## Dreamrogue

Yeah, I like what spockman said the best... and the quote about the chickens. I'm new here and not familiar with the LD lingo, but the simple answer I saw from years of dream interpretation was to look at your life. Having the ability to lucid dream shouldn't take away from your ability to learn from the symbolism your soul is presenting you with, even when you are conscious. In sleep or in waking life, symbols give us hints as to what our souls desire, and what temporary desires are getting in the way of those big, necessary desires. Maybe your need here is to take a step back from focus on controlling your dreams and work on understanding your sexual life? And I have to join the crowd and add that masturbation is always an option.

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## Baphometslayer

Cut your winky off?

That might keep you from having sex or something. Dunno if you can do that though. It's pretty normal for me to lose limbs in my dreams and it doesn't phase me.

I'm usually like, "NOOOOOO"

Then afterward I'm like, "Well this sucks, oh well"

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## deepsleep

Cut it off in the dream If you know what I meen.
Please please make sure your dreaming first.

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## Atras

If u dont want to have sex then when u enter ur lucid dream try to do something the opposite of sex, like go on a  murderous rampage and kill every girl in sight.  :tongue2:  just a suggestion

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## Mzzkc

> If u dont want to have sex then when u enter ur lucid dream try to do something the opposite of sex, like go on a  murderous rampage and kill every girl in sight.  just a suggestion



Firstly, that is not the opposite of sex, at all.

Second, that could turn some people on. Then again, pretty much everything could be sexually stimulating to someone. 

Really, the best answer is to learn self control. For, if you can successfully control yourself, you can control your dream. Not just when it comes to abstaining from sex, but in so many other areas as well.

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## Atras

it is the opposite, cuz sex is making love and the opposite of love is violence.  And going on a murderous rampage probably falls into the category of violence.  ::D:

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## Mzzkc

The opposite of love is hate, not violence. Going on a murderous rampage, for the heck of it, does not imply a feeling of hatred. Depending on the person it could actually lead to sex, which is what we're trying to avoid here. Furthermore, sex itself does not necessarily have to have love in it to exist. So defining sex as "making love" is inaccurate at best.

I don't want to go any more off topic, so if you want to continue this debate shoot me a PM.

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## PaddyMcNasty

Thanks for everyone's replies. Sorry I hadn't posted any progress but I hadn't had a lucid in a few weeks.

For anyone who's interested, I may have the solution: Sex Quest.

I had a dream the other night that I had moved into a new flat with my good friend Wee Andy and a Hollywood actress who I like very much. Didn't talk to her much out of shyness. Then I got sent for the shopping and halfway there suspected I may be dreaming, did an RC and discovered I was right. I flew to the nearest house and decided that said actress would be there waiting for me. I knocked on the door and it was answered by a woman who looked like Peter Kay in "Britain's Got the Pop Factor" (UK TV programme, basically a fat man in drag). Undeterred I asked her for directions to my flat and she sent her son to lead me there. So we had a bit of fun flying about and questing and the like, then made it back to the flat. Where I had lucid sex with an actress. Awesome.

This is the second time I managed to have lucid sex, but the only time I managed to do other stuff as well. Both times I've had to stay right on the edge of dreaming and waking and have woken up straight after.

Anyone else having the same problems as I've had, maybe try this, let me know if it's any use.

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## Iamerik

Have real life sex, so you can then start using your dreams for the impossible instead?  ::banana::

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## Ars_Moriendi

Hi, I have suggestion.  I have the same problem as you, become lucid, try to have sex, get excited and wake up right as it gets good. I was annoyed at how whenever I have the power to do whatever I want, I want to have sex. Well last night I dreamt of a beautiful blonde standing in my yard I became lucid. I was about to go over to her and get freaky then decided not this time and jumped up into the atmosphere. It was cool except for one little problem... I'm afraid of heights! So as I flew up into the sky it scared me and I woke up. I'm fairly new at this and can come to one conclusion that may help you as well. Next time I become lucid, instead of doing something crazy right away I'm just going to calmly walk around and do simple things, at least until I have a better feel for it and get used to it. Then I eill time travel, fly, and have wild sex with beautiful blondes.

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## Royalpeach

Huh... never tried having sex in a lucid dream, probably because I've had so few.  :tongue2:  Still, lots of times i have NLs where I'm lying in bed with hot girls, and that doesn't wake me up.

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## TheSunGod

I agree that in order to become more sucessful at controlling your dream you should try to focus on a "set point".  That is, take some time to acquaint yourself with your inner self and try to notice things.  Look at the environment you are in and sharpen your attention to detail.  Learn to calm yourself in order to lengthen the dream experience.

I think that combining dreams is a good idea, like that mr. spock said.  Go do something and then as a reward go have sex.  Give your mind time to know you plan on having sex, and by the time you're done with whatever you're doing you should be confidant that you have the ability to do anything you want and if you want to have sex your mind will certainly have a woman waiting for you somewhere.  ::cheers::

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## Yonin

> Sex is boring.  When can you fly to other planets and destroy shit using fire from your fingers?
> 
> Or detonate a nuclear bomb and live through it?
> 
> These are the types of things I want to do when I become lucid.  Forget sex, how boring.



This is the truth 


I  drew the line when I was in a LD and was excited to ride this insane godly roller coster, then I was seduced into sex and the scene changed!

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## SaviourDC

> Help! I'm a monster, I can't stop myself.
> 
> I keep ruining my LDs by trying to have sex. Every time I try it wakes me up. My libido is too powerful, even last night when I decided if I went lucid I would go flying and avoid sex, I did it anyway and woke myself up.
> 
> Maybe if I had more sex in real life, but girls don't seem to appreciate Star Wars based chat up lines. Girls are weird.
> 
> Anyone else any experience, and overcome this?
> 
> Cheers
> Paddy



Use the force, it is within all of us.

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