# Sleep and Dreams > Dream Gallery >  >  3/15/11 The most twisted Dream I have ever had

## Loonybin Resident

This actually happened on 3/13/11, my mistake.


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I had this really disturbing dream the other night that has been In my head for days and I feel like I need to let it out in the open.

First Let me start off by talking a little bit about my Grandfather. 
I never really knew my grandfather, He took his life by the gun when I was about 3 years old (he was probably in his late 50's or early 60's). I have only seen pictures and heard a lot of stories my father told me about him. He was an ex Marine Drill Sgt back in his day. As he got older he was a bit of an alcoholic, when he decided to quit alcohol the doctor prescribed him pills to help him with the alcohol withdrawal. He seemed like a real happy guy when he was on the pills but when he wasn't, he was severely depressed and the total opposite. To skip ahead, eventually he started to have major health issues and was in and out of the hospital all the time. He was in so much pain, so depressed, and so tired of being in the hospital all the time that when he got the chance, that's when he decided to take his own life.

And now for the dream...


My Grandfather is still alive for some reason (seemed normal in the dream so I didn't go lucid) but I still have not met him yet. I'm walking around town going throughout my day. Sometime in the dream I hear that my Grandfather is sick in the hospital, and the hospital is only making him worse. I feel bad because I haven't met him yet so I rush to the hospital just in case he passes away. I get there and he looks exactly like the pictures I have seen of him. He says "who are you?" in a weak raspy voice", I replied "I'm your grandson, you haven't seen me since I was a baby". I then realize that the hospital nurses are not feeding him or giving him any water and that is why he is on the verge of death. I decide to kidnap him from the hospital to see if I could help. I'm trying to hold him up and help him walk to my car with his arm around my shoulder and he keeps falling to the ground. I somehow manage to get him to my car and as I'm racing home he is in the passengers seat coughing up blood telling me " I'm not going to make it". I stomp the gas and get him to my place, I drag him to the bathroom because he is constantly vomiting and coughing up blood. I grab him water and he drinks it but just vomits it back out. That's when he leans against the wall while on the floor unable to move because he is so weak. He tells me "son, please reach into my pocket". So I do and that's when I find a gun. He says "Please son, I can't die in pain like this, please shoot me", I reply "Grandpa I can't." That's when he says "would you rather me suffer a painful death? Just do it...please." And that is when I contemplated and started to feel bad that he would probably suffer and not pass away until the next day. I started to cry, he said "don't cry boy...do me this favor and then throw my body in the river (something like that). I gave him a huge hug, helped him put his finger on the trigger with mine (since he was too weak to), and shot my poor Grandfather clean in the head. I grabbed a tarp, wrapped his body up in it and took it to the river. I then started crying so much that I woke up with tears in my eyes.


This was seriously the most vivid non-lucid dream I have ever had, I can't ever recall a non-lucid dream where I remember almost every word that was spoken and stuff like that. It's strange because the only people in the whole dream was me, my grandfather and a nurse I saw in the hospital. Nobody from my immediate family was in it, no Dad, No Mom, no nothing. 
It was really a mind-screw, and I can't tell if it was a nightmare or what. Any thoughts would be appreciated. 

-Loony

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## jennysen456

As far as i can interpret this, i think you have always missed your grandfather and wished that he was there for you as you grew up. Whatever you know of him is from what you have heard about him. The thing playing in your mind is that, how can a marine end his own life and give up on it. You also realize that it would really would have been that he could not carry on with and thats the reason he took his own life. You also regret not been old enough at that time to help your grandpa. That my Take.

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## JeffPlox

Lucid dreaming doesn't necessarily mean controlling your dreams.
Infact, lucid is a synonym for _clear_.

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## rkenning

its pretty common for your mind to make up some pretty twisted shit that really gets ur emotions wired but i havent read or had a dream as mindfucking as that. jesus

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## Chimpertainment

Im sorry that your grandpa didnt get the help he needed. My grandpa had big issues from being in the military during ww2 and used alcohol for most of his life to cover the pain. As far as the dream goes, my personal explanation would be this: There are two basic things i see in this dream. One, your mind is giving forgiveness to your grandfather for his choice to take his own life. Secondly, your mind is asking if you would do the same were you in his place by some chance; Acted out in melodrama reserved only for the best dreams. It seems you see the reason he felt the need to leave and are understanding of that. 
Always remember this dream and any like it because in the future they will mean just as much as a waking life memory.

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## kumkum01

HI guys..I like that........"The thing playing in your mind is that, how can a marine end his own life and give up on it. You also realize that it would really would have been that he could not carry on with and thats the reason he took his own life"........thanks for nice sharing that.... 

Best regards........

kumkum

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## whitedreams

shit im tearing up reading this, sounds like a really emotional dream, cool experience though. Maybe one of your dream goal could be to talk to him or sumon him back to a dream. take him out to get an ice cream, everyone likes ice cream

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## Mirse

Normally, I'd make a stupid post for no apparent reason, but this hits me right here.

That's sad, OP; I never met my grandfather, but it's better than knowing that he killed himself. ;-;

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