# Lucid Dreaming > DV Academy > Current Courses > Intro Class >  >  Nazrax' workbook

## Nazrax

*Reality Checks:*
I do reality checks on a regular basis throughout the day, usually unscheduled. Unfortunately, most of my day is either sitting behind a computer or sitting behind a steering wheel, so there's not much variety of "odd" things to kick off my RCs (or, maybe I'm just thinking too small ...). When I RC, I do the "internal nose pinch," i.e. lifting my tongue to the roof of my mouth to block off my airway. Just like a real nose pinch, it means I can't breathe IWL, but I should be able to breathe in a dream. At the same time, I try to become more aware of myself and my senses: what I'm feeling, what I'm hearing, what I'm seeing. I also think about where I was 5 minutes ago.

*Dream Signs:*
* HUGE areas (so large I'm not aware of the ceiling or far walls)
* Really uncomfortable situations driving
* Very low light levels and lights that don't work right

*Short-Term Goals:*
* Have more regular lucid dreams
* Increase lucid awareness
* Fly

*Long-Term Goals:*
* Learn to WILD consistently / on demand
* Be able to shapeshift and have the shift "stick" 
* Combat social anxiety

*Lucid/Dream Recall History:*
I've kept a DreamViews journal for a while, on and off. My dream journaling usually goes pretty well. I have the occasional dry spell (like last week), but normally as long as I try, I can remember a fair amount. Over the last few months, a friend and I have started trading dreams every morning, and that's really helped my motivation. Finally finding a journaling technique that works well for me has also been a huge help.

*Current Technique:*
WBTB + MILD. I can't use an alarm in the middle of the night, so I use a large glass of water instead. It usually wakes me up after either 3 or 4.5 hours. When I wake up, I do an RC, jot down some quick dream notes, use the bathroom, then write out the full journal entry (or entries). I use a Bluetooth keyboard with my tablet, so I can lay in bed, head on pillow, and type out my dreams in great detail with my eyes closed. I find that, no matter how hard I try, I can't remember all of the dream details up front; I only remember the details in pieces as I'm exhaustively recording the dream. On average, journaling probably takes about 10 minutes, so I'm awake and semi-active for about 15 minutes total.

Once I'm finished, I try to fix in my mind a dream I want to re-enter, fix an intention to reenter it, recognize it, and become lucid, then fall asleep. More often than not, I don't try to reenter the dream I just left - my dreams aren't usually anything I want to get back into - but instead a pleasant, older, memorable dream.

*General info:*
I found out about lucid dreaming many years ago, and I've been interesed in it ever since. I dove into it in earnest about 4 years ago, reading everything I could on it. Unfortunately, though I have a lot of "head knowledge" about it, my successes have been few, far between, and really weak.

When I become lucid, it's never been through an RC. It's not that my RCs in my dreams fail; rather, I have no memory of ever RCing in a dream. Instead, I typically just become aware that I'm dreaming. If a DC walked up to me and said "Hey, you're dreaming," it would have had about the same effect as if he'd walked up and said "Hey, the sky's blue." I've never had the "OH WOW I'M LUCID" moment that so many people talk about. Most of the times I've become lucid, I've tried to exert some kind of control over the dream, but my awareness has been so low that it's been more of an instinct than a conscious decision. The obvious answer is to stabalize my dream - but since I don't get that moment of non-lucid to lucid transition, it never even occurs to me that there's anything to stabalize.

As far as I can tell, MILDing hasn't helped at all (so far). Most of my lucids have followed from failed WILD attempts. Due to my incredible lack of awareness and control in my lucids, WILDing is very attractive to me. Unfortunately, every time I've ever tried it I've ended up with fairly bad insomnia. When I fall asleep normally, it's a very, very quick thing. If I'm awake for even 5 minutes after I lay down with the intention to sleep, I know I have insomnia that night, and it's going to take me a long time to get to sleep. When I attempt a WILD, I can easily stay perfectly still for 30 to 45 minutes, and I can keep my thoughts relatively calm - but sleep evades me. Worse, once I give up on the attempt, I can't get the sleep back. It sometimes takes me over an hour after giving up on the WILD before I can get to sleep. Sometimes I just have to give up altogether and go read somewhere to get myself really tired before trying to sleep again.

I normally get between 7-8 hours of sleep each night. A short WBTB doesn't make much difference, but I can't do a long one. I normally try my WILDs on Friday and Saturday nights, when I can afford to lose a little more sleep.

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## Nazrax

Last night got off to a good start (or so I thought), but in the end things went poorly.

On the way home from work, I started listening to the DV Podcast. Hearing the excitement and passion in OpheliaBlue's and RareCola's voices ... I actually felt rather giddy. Over the course of the evening, I was trying to be extra-aware (though, frankly, I don't think I did a great job). I was also regularly repeating "I remember my dreams" and "I have lucid dreams" to myself.

I went to bed just after 10, drinking a bunch of water first. I woke up 2.5 hours later - less than I expected, though not unheard of. I need to take better notes about sleep/wake times, but I think my cycles are about 75-80 minutes, not the median 90. My dream recall was terrible: I only got a tiny fragment. I wrote it down, used the bathroom, took a B multivitamin, ran through some more MILD mantras, visualized a dream I wanted to have. and went to sleep.

At least, I tried to sleep. Like I said in my first post, if I don't fall asleep within a couple of minutes, it's not going to happen. I laid there trying every physical and mental relaxation technique I know, and sleep still eluded me. I laid still; I moved any time I got the slightest desire to; I focused on the white blobs behind my eyelids; I played music through my pillow speakers ("Subliminal Lucid" as found elsewhere on DV) and tried to focus on that; I ran through a rough 61-point relaxation technique; I listened to my self-hypnosis recording; I counted sheep. At times, my mind would start to wander, but it never lasted long.

After about 2 hours of this, I think the last thing I tried was to ignore sleep and start planning out what I needed to do today. Next thing I remember, my alarm is going off. Dream recall was very stubborn - I thought I wasn't going to get anything - but in the end I got a couple of moderately detailed dreams.

I don't know for sure, but I suspect I actually got myself too excited about it yesterday evening. I had set myself such high expectations that I WOULD have a lucid dream that it kept my mind too busy to actually fall back asleep. I seem to have a lot of trouble finding balances: staying aware vs falling asleep with WILDs, or convincing myself that I'll have a lucid dream without actually causing myself sleep problems.

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## Nazrax

Ugh.

Last night was even worse. I decided that I was going to forego wbtb and just get some good sleep. I took a nice relaxing shower and drank a hot cup of chamomile tea, then wetn to bed around 10:20.  I woke up at 2:50 (4.5 hours, or 3 complete cycles). As I was trying to remember my dreams, I fell back asleep, then woke up at 3:15 (with no memories of any dreams). That brief "nap" was probably my downfall. As I was using the bathroom, I was aware that I wasn't feeling tired, After being in bed for about half an hour, running through the usual techniques, I gave up, got up, and spent a little over an hour soldering my latest attempt at a dream mask. Getting back in bed at 5:30, I felt tired, but the tiredness seemed to go away once I was actually laying down and trying to sleep. I tried planning out my day, but that didn't get me anywhere. I tried to encourage my mind to wander, but it never got beyond whatever I consciously created. Eventually, I tried to keep my conscious mind neutral and just "watch" what came by. i've tried that before without success, but it must have worked this time, since I don't remember anything until my alarm went off at 6:50.

Unsurprisingly, I have no memories of any dreams last night, and I'm even more tired today than I was yesterday.

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## Nazrax

Last night I just wanted to sleep well. I went to bed at 9:50, woke up at 11:something, 1:30 (thanks to the baby), and 4:something; but each time I just rolled over and went back to sleep.

My dream recall suffered, but at least I slept well. All I got was a fragment about camping and walking in the woods.

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## Nazrax

Friday night was a fairly good sleeping night (though we got in bed much later than usual), but I got nothing.

We took naps on Saturday. I'd listened to the WILD podcast on Friday, and that got me re-energized about WILDing. WILDs have always apealed to me much more that DILDs have. I wasn't really that tired, so I decided to use my nap as WILD practice. I think I made it further than I ever have before: at one point, I realized that I could "see" the ceiling, even though my eyes were closed. I thought about trying to "open my dream eyes," but I did an "internal nose plug" test which revealed I was still awake.

Saturday night, I spent a little while trying to WILD, but got nothing. However, I'm getting better at relaxing with an intent to sleep, since this WILD attempt didn't keep me awake like ones in the past often have.

Yesterday, whenever I thought about it, I told myself that "I will remember my dreams tonight" and "I will lucid dream tonight." The lucid dream didn't happen, but I ended up waking up after every single sleep cycle and recording dreams for most of them. I've never recorded so many dreams for a single night.

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## NyxCC

Welcome to intro class!  :smiley: 

That WILD nap attempt was so close. It's quite a fascinating feeling how at some point you start seeing the room through your eyelids. Perhaps next time just wait a bit more and then imagine yourself rolling out of bed and then the RC.

Wow, you certainly have good dream recall, but the amount and detail of dreams you recorded last night is really phenomenal.  ::goodjob2::  Great potential for dream sign recognition and very good for dream practice in general. It can also be useful to browse through older entries when one has time and think about the dreams one has.

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## Nazrax

Well, last night was disappointing.

I spent yesterday doing the same thing as Sunday, repeating "I will lucid dream tonight" and "I will remember my dreams tonight" whenever I remembered. I actually got to go to bed about half an hour earlier than usual, which was nice, getting to bed around 9:45. I woke up just after midnight. Laying there, I was able to remember more than one dream; but as soon as I moved, I completely lost them  :Bang head:  Normally, I can record things without looking at my tablet's screen - it turns on as soon as I press a key on my keyboard - but last night something wasn't working right and I ended up having to look at the screen while I fiddled with settings. I don't know if it was the 2.5 hour sleep, the light from the tablet, or something else, but I had trouble falling back asleep. I think I fell asleep shortly after 12:45.

I woke up a cycle later at 2:20. I had the vague impression of dreams, but nothing that I could remember. I quickly got back to sleep.

I woke up at 5AM, which is around when I usually get up (my typical alarm is set for 5:10). I didn't even have the vague feeling of having any dreams to recall. I decided that since I'd gotten my normal amount of sleep, I'd try to WILD until this morning's alarm (6:30). Alas, that didn't get anywhere either. 

I was able to lie perfectly still for 45 minutes. A couple of times, something unusual happened: the indistinct white blobs that I see when my eyes are closed suddenly became very bright and seemed to fill my vision. That's never happened before, even when I was concentrating on them as my anchor. This morning, I was generally trying to ignore them, instead focusing on the sound of the air filter in the hallway. I don't know if this was some kind of HI, but the two or three times it happened, it didn't last for more than a short time. 

Eventually, I became aware that my muscles were gradually tensing, which is a common occurance for my WILD attempts. Despite trying to relax my arms and legs, imaging waves of relaxation going over them, etc, I became too restless after 45 minutes and had to get up and try to shake out the tension. The second 45 minute segment didn't have anything interesting; I had to roll over a few times, and I generally didn't get anywhere.

I'm currently rereading ETWLD. I know there's a part in there where he talks about categorizing dreamsigns, and I intend to start using his method. I'm sure I have many dreamsigns that I'm just not considering, and I hope this helps me identify more.

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## Nazrax

Last night was marginally better. As usual, I reminded myself during the day to remember my dreams and have lucid dreams. I got to bed a little later than usual, around 10:30. I woke up every other cycle and got a couple of fragments. After the 4:30 wakeup, I spent a few minutes with some self hypnosis reminding myself to remember my dreams and have lucid dreams; it then took a fairly long time for me to fall back asleep. It seems like, if I don't fall asleep right away, I lose the ability to fall asleep. I really need to figure out how to get past that, not just for WILDing but for my sleep health in general.

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## NyxCC

I find SSILD to be quite helpful with falling asleep. It relaxes you plus you might get an ld bonus. Also, I like to just follow my breath without thinking. Other people like to visualize to help them fall asleep.

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## Nazrax

I hardly touched my computer over the break, so I have some catching up to do here ...

Thursday morning, I woke up earlier than I needed to, so I decided to try for a WILD. I started out with progressive relaxation (tense-release-tense-release each major muscle group), followed by the 61 point relaxation. For the second half of the progressive relaxation and the first half of the 61 point relaxation, my mind was wandering a great deal; but by the time I was done, I'd settled into my standard steady state, which remained until it was time to get up. I only remembered one dream.

Thursday night was good, though I had no recall come Friday morning. I'm starting to wonder if I have some kind of mental block towards lucid dreaming. i've been at this for four years, and I've only had a small handful of dreams. Moreover, any time I seem to be making any progress, my recall tends to drop to zip. I've replaced my other daytime mantras with ones that affirm that lucid dreaming is a good thing. We'll see if that changes anything ...

Friday night was a good night (probably helped by my being totally exhausted from Friday), and my recall was good.

Saturday night was another good night with good recall.

I attempted a WILD during my Sunday nap. I'd intended to start off with both relaxation techniques, though somehow I forgot to follow the progressive relaxation with the 61 point relaxation. Once in my steady state, I tried various things, especially trying to focus on the noise of the air filter, but without success. Eventually, I tried a different mantra, and found that it somehow "fit" a rhythm that felt natural to me. I was able to do it fairly mindlessly, and it wasn't long before I could feel myself slipping away. It was hard not to get excited and ruin it. Suddenly, I felt hot all over, it seemed my eyes wanted to pop open, and my limbs started to feel "funny." Before I could continue, the dog came over and started whining to go out  :Pissed: . Next time around, I'll do the relaxation techniques followed by that mantra and see what happens ...

Last night was interesting. I woke up around midnight only remembering a tiny fragment. I woke up again around 3 with no recall at all. As I was trying to think of something, anything, I remembered reading a post about journaling waking-life stuff before going to bed to help encourage recall. I really didn't want to have another night of no remembered dreams, so I went ahead and journaled parts of my day. Almost immediately after finishing my daytime journaling, my dreams popped into my head, and I was able to record them with good detail. After I finished I took my standard middle-of-the-night B complex and went back to bed.

It took me a while to get back to sleep, so I remembered your suggestion to use SSILD to get tired and ran through a few cycles. I must have fallen asleep during the slow cycles. As a bonus, I also got a short lucid  :smiley:  Interestingly, it took place in one of the dreams from earlier in the night, which I'd also tried to incubate as a MILD. Overkill FTW, I guess ...

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## Nazrax

Nothing too exciting last night. More dreams. I got to sleep around 10:50, got woken up by the dog around 2:50, and got woken up by the alarm at 5:10. I actually fell back asleep for about 30 minutes and got an extra dream when I woke up. At the 2:50 wakeup, I took another B complex and started some SSILD; I don't think I even made it to the long cycles before I fell asleep.

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## NyxCC

Congrats on the ld!  ::goodjob2:: 

I liked how you used day journalling to jog your memory, which helped you recall quite a lot of dreams. I wonder if trying to remember previous night's dreams if no recall of this night's would have a similar effect. 

December TOTMs are out! It will be a fun month for those: presents, walking snowmen, arctic wolves. I think another cool task (from last year) that passes well with the theme is to make it snow. No wings for that, but it's absolutely fun!  :smiley:

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## Nazrax

I certainly hope to do the tasks this month; despite my low LD count, I've managed it both in October and November  :smiley:  Making it snow was actually one of my suggestions in the TOTM club, but I realized after the fact that it was already one of last year's tasks (teach me to research before I post next time ...)

Last night was a fairly normal night. My middle of the night recall was bad, so I did some more day journaling which jogged my dream memory a little. As for thinking back on the previous night's dreams, it's probably something I should practice. Except for particularly memorable dreams, even after I've journalled them, I have no idea what I dreamed about, and I have to check my notes if it comes up in conversation. ("What did you dream about last night?" "I have no idea, let me check ...")

I didn't get a chance to do a detailed dreamsign analysis today, but I did realize something: I've had a LOT of DS9 dreams recently. It's not something I can work into daily life (I haven't watched DS9 in probably 15 years, though I have been following Tor's DS9 reread recently).

I think I fell asleep during SSILD again during my WBTB.

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## Nazrax

Last night was another fairly standard night. We went to bed around 10 PM, though stuff kept intruding and kept us up until around 10:30. I woke naturally at 1:30 to OKish recall, wrote down my (very short) dream, then did more daytime journaling. Our baby woke us at 3:30, where I had OK recall. I woke up a few minutes before my 6:15 alarm, again with some recall.

Getting to sleep after the 1:30 wakeup was odd. I was trying to do SSILD again, but I kept getting lost before I'd even finished one cycle. Usually, if that happens, I just sleep - but last night, I kept becoming aware a few minutes later (I'm not sure if I actually looked at the clock). Thinking back on it, I suppose it's possible they were FAs - I totally forgot to RC - but I doubt it.

Last night did give me the most disturbing dream I've had in a while. I don't usually feel emotions in a dream, but I certainly felt them after I'd killed the guy. That feeling of disquiet has stuck with me pretty much all day  :Sad:

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## Nazrax

Last night was an odd night. I started the night with a quick 30 second day journal, then got to sleep a little before 10. I woke up once during the night, at 12:30, staying awake just long enough to pull off my latest attempt at a sleep mask, wonder why I just did that, then go back to sleep. I only remembered waking up at all thanks to my confusion in the morning of "Where'd the sleep mask go?" (I only know the time thanks to the mask's record).

This morning, I had to get up and leave quickly, so I just jotted down a few notes upon first waking up. Later, I was pleased to be able to join them into a fairly detailed, coherent narrative.

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## NyxCC

> I certainly hope to do the tasks this month; despite my low LD count, I've managed it both in October and November  Making it snow was actually one of my suggestions in the TOTM club, but I realized after the fact that it was already one of last year's tasks (teach me to research before I post next time ...)



Definitely go for them! I think having to do tasks really makes a difference both for ld quantity and quality. If there's something you want to do in an ld, you are really motivated and may try harder. They also help you keep focus during the dream, so you are less likely to lose lucidity or even stability. 

Awesome journalling! That memory of yours is really great. Indeed, it might help to go back to previous dreams and think about them whenever you have the time. I think that with your memory, there will come a point where you will begin thinking during the dream "this reminds me of a similar situation in a dream" and then ld!  ::goodjob2::

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## Nazrax

The weekend tends to be my time to experiment with WILDs. Alas, we got to bed pretty late (10:45, though I didn't mind too much since we got to see a handbell choir). I woke up at 4:20 (not quite 4 cycles later - a little odd) and recorded my dream. I decided to be responsible and not try to WILD, but I did spend a few minutes reading over old dreams. Sleep didn't come easily, so I SSILD'd some and got back to sleep. When my wife's alarm went off at 6:30, I felt really groggy and didn't remember anything else.

On Saturday we got to bed just before 10. I woke up a couple of times and went right back to bed (my "water alarm" wasn't well calibrated). I finally woke up around 3:30 and decided it was time to try for a WILD. I did some relaxation exercises, put on some isotones (descending from 10.5Hz to 4.5Hz over 20 minutes), and started in on my mantra. I got some good wandering thoughts, but nothing ever became truly visual, and I never felt anything out of the ordinary. After about 45 minutes, I decided it was time to sleep for real. I did a few SSILD cycles and slept. I had my best lucid ever. I guess realizing I was in a false awakening was enough to give me that awareness boost that's usually so lacking. Finding out that my most common RC doesn't actually work was disappointing, but at least now I know. My new short-term goal is to try every RC and see how they work in my own dreams.

For my Sunday nap, I decided to try a WILD, but to try it a little differently. I've noticed that laying still seems to be a great way for me *not* to fall asleep. Since the whole point of a WILD is to fall asleep (yet retain awareness), I decided to try mimicking what I do when I'm normally falling asleep: to scratch, shift, fidget, etc. It's not that I have the urge to do these things while WILDing and have to suppress them; I can easily lay totally still for 45 minutes. But, I've noticed that I do them when falling asleep normally. I tried to focus on the sound of the air filter but to keep my normal movements. Next thing I know, nap time is over (and I have no recall; boo). That's the first time ever that I've fallen asleep while trying to WILD. I'm going to have to play with this more, to see if I can strengthen my awareness but still fall asleep.

Last night, I think I did something similar, though my memory is fuzzy and I have no written record of it. My recall was good, though.

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## NyxCC

Congrats on the long ld and Totm, Nazrax! You have applied the dream immension extending technique excellently and also very good wife summon!  ::goodjob2:: 

I like your latest idea of trying out different RCs!

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## Nazrax

I have to get up early on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, so Monday night I got to bed at a fairly good time (after drinking plenty of water). I must have drunk too much, since I woke up after only about 1 cycle. I didn't get any recall from it. I drank some more, but not enough, since I didn't wake up again until my alarm went off. My recall was OK but not great.

Again, last night I got in bed at a good time and drank some water. Again, it ended up waking me after 1 cycle. I drank the same quantity of water and returned to bed, waking 3 cycles later. I didn't have any recall either time. By this time, it was only about half an hour until my alarm was scheduled to go off, so I decided to do some WILD practice. For the first ten or fifteen minutes, I tried what I described last time and got a little more drowsy, but nowhere near sleep. For the rest of it I went traditional and kept completely still. The whole time I was trying to keep my attention on the fan noise. Alas, I didn't even get any mind wandering, let alone HI. Oh well, each night gets me closer, right?

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## Nazrax

Last night was a good night. At 10 PM I drank plenty of water, did some SSILD cycles, and slept, waking at 12:40 with good recall of one dream and a dream fragment. After recording them (which took some time; I think I had trouble piecing it together), I drank a lot of water (really aiming for that 2:30 mark), did some SSILD cycles, and got to sleep; but again I slept until 4:20. Again, I had good recall, but it also took a while to write down. I'd been planning to WILD, but because both WBTBs were longer than usual, I decided just to go back to sleep. After more SSILD and a B multivitamin, I slept until morning. As usual, my morning recall was worse than my WBTB recall, but I got something.

I've started reading over my old dreams a bit, and I'm going to try to keep it up. Frankly, I have to force myself to do it, since most of my dreams are very strange and often involve me being in (or observing) uncomfortable situations. Ah, well, hopefully once I get this stuff figured out I can get enough control over my dreams to actually enjoy them ...

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## NyxCC

> I've started reading over my old dreams a bit, and I'm going to try to keep it up. Frankly, I have to force myself to do it, since most of my dreams are very strange and often involve me being in (or observing) uncomfortable situations. Ah, well, hopefully once I get this stuff figured out I can get enough control over my dreams to actually enjoy them



The good thing is after reading some of these entries, you get to identify situations that are typical dream stuff. And if you recall the dream and think ok, this is the part in question where it points so strongly that it's a dream, and eventually you will start recognizing these things during dreams too. Sometimes I go over older entries and highlight the key stuff so it's easier to recall and remember. You already have excellent dream journal organization, so that's going to pay off.

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## Nazrax

I got the idea yesterday to hack a "visual alarm" into my dream mask. It worked beautifully, waking me up exactly 5 hours after I went to sleep. The timing was good, as I was woken out of a dream. Unfortunately, due to a combination of "It worked!" and "It's bright! Where's the button?!?", I lost all but a tiny fragment of the dream (it involved my oldest daughter). I used the bathroom, did some SSILD cycles ... and couldn't sleep. After half an hour, I went downstairs, made some chamomile tea, and spent half an hour reading my old dreams. I went back to bed, but I never did get to sleep, so I'm operating on 5 hours of sleep today. Weeeee.

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## NyxCC

I wasn't quite sure what kind of dream mask you were refering to, is it something like Remee? Never tried one of these.

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## Nazrax

I'm a programmer by trade, and I dabble with electronics as a hobby. A few years back, I decided I wanted to make my own NovaDreamer / REM Dreamer / etc mask. I don't have much time for it, but I'm making slow progress.

My initial attempts were all shaped after the other products, and nothing I tried worked for me. I'm a side sleeper, and their board designs were all so big that they'd hit my pillow. Not only were they uncomfortable, but whenever I woke up I'd find the mask had slid up to my forehead. My latest design is radically different, and initial results have been promising. It's comfortable, it stays in place all night, and the lights are clearly visible. The sensors I chose ended up not working well, but I've got new ones the way that I hope will work better.

Why do this? I've got a few reasons. One was cost: commercial offerings are remarkably expensive (though, by now, I've probably spent as much on this project as if I'd just purchased one). Of course, learning more about electronics was another. A third is that I want to do things that none of the commercial offerings provide. I don't just want it to blink at me; I want it to MORSE at me, sending something like "dreaming." Plus, if it can tell when my eyes are moving vs when they aren't, then I should be able to program it to pick out simple patterns and respond to them. How much of this is really possible and how much is a pipe dream? Only time will tell.

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## Nazrax

Friday night, I tweaked the mask configuration to start out very dim and gradually raise the brightness. I'd hoped that it would let me recognize it in a dream for a minute before it got too bright, but I didn't get any memories from that awakening. I suspect the timer may have been too short, so I've pushed it out. My morning recall was respectable.

Saturday night, I pushed the alarm back by twenty minutes. Unfortunately, I was woken by a different alarm (my computer's battery backup) about half an hour before the mask was supposed to wake me. Oh well. My morning recall was OK.

Last night, I ran over my common dreamsigns as I was going to bed, running through each one and telling myself that I'd recognize a dream if I saw it (huge room, camping, vacations, etc). For an unknown reason, I woke up about 45 minutes before the mask was scheduled to wake me. At first, I had no recall at all; then memory struck and I remembered having a lucid! I only got fragments of it, and I don't remember how it started, but given that it took place in a grocery store it may well have been the "huge rooms" dreamsign coming into play. I even managed to do the other task of the month, even though I hadn't been planning on it at all during my waking hours. Morning recall was OK.

I'm still annoyed with my complete lack of ability to remember that I can break out of the dream's plot and do my own thing. I try to practice "When I realize I'm dreaming, I'll ..." in waking life, but I so rarely have that moment of realization that would trigger such an action. I probably need to change it to something like "As I'm having a lucid dream, I'll remember to ..." and see if that helps. Of course, I'm only 10 dreams into this, so maybe it just comes with time ...

I don't know what's happened to my recall. For a long time, I was able to remember lots more details with lots less effort. Now, it seems like a battle every time I wake up, trying to claw something out of my memory. I know it's still considered good, but for me it's a regression, and that worries me.

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## NyxCC

It's really exciting that you got to build your own dream mask, trying to find the design that's best for your own needs. I have to agree on some of these masks looking quite uncomfortable. I can't even put a normal mask most of the time because it gets entagled with my hair and also like to sleep sideways. I wish you all the best with your project, sooner or later you will find a way to set those lights right and they will cue you about the dream state. 

Even without the mask, your progress is really impressive. Like you said, just 10 lds, but it seems to me that you have already 50 or so. Long lds, great recall, totms completed. Oh, congrats on the latest Totm by the way.  ::goodjob::  As I was saying to Steph, I am truly impressed by people who manage the counting task. Some of us here don't even dare trying it.  :tongue2:  

I guess if you catch your lucid among a number of other dreams, the amount of self-control or straight forward thinking would be a bit less than if you catch it among the first dreams after a wake- sleep moment, like wbtb or natural wakes (but then there might be other difficulties with these). Sometimes the dream scenarios can be really overpowering, that's why it helps to have the task ready beforehand. I like a quick Q&A session with myself during the day or just the mantra before bedtime or wbtb. Q&A: if this was a dream, what would I do A: task (one two words), or the mantra "I realize that I am dreaming, China Wall". I like to keep them short and simple, but whatever sounds good to you. You may add some sort of mental word rhythm as you pronounce the mantra, I've heard it helps.

Finally, your recall seems fine, so I wouldn't worry about it too much at this point. If there's some persistent disturbance then we may think about it but it's better not to have your subcon on a negative mantra like my recall's not good. Your recall is great!

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## Nazrax

That's the funny thing: had I been more aware, I doubt I would have tried it. I'm pretty sure Sageous would have counted that last lucid as a "false lucid," both because of the complete lack of awareness and because I was _this close_ to completely forgetting about it. But, I'm still glad it happened, since it's another confidence booster (especially after reading the remarks from you and Ophelia). One of these days, when I get a really clear lucid (like the previous one, the FA), I'd like to try it again when I'm more "me."

Last night was a complete wash. I'd decided to skip wbtb and just get a good night's sleep. I woke at 5 AM anyway, and I didn't have a hint of a dream. I finally got back to sleep and woke with my wife's alarm at 6:30, again without a hint of anything. Oh well.

Today is the first day of my Christmas break (I didn't take much vacation during the year, so I have to burn it all at the end of the year), so hopefully I'll be able to spend a little more time on it over the next few weeks. I'm trying to keep myself really optimistic  :smiley: 


I'm positive that having goals has helped, though so far they've tended to get integrated into the existing dream instead of giving me the nudge to really become aware and take control. That's one reason why I'm trying to set "try lots of RCs and stabilization techniques" as a goal. The other is, of course, that I really want to try some of them (if I have 6 fingers on my hand, do I have individual control over each one? I want to find out!)

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## NyxCC

Well, even with low awareness lds, you get tons of practice. You might be surprised but all of this is being carefully recorded in your subcon, providing the opportunity for these memories to emerge during another dream and lead to more lucidity. Sometimes you might get to do dream tasks non-lucidity and then catch them midway. 

Wish you great holidays, with lots of opportunities to relax and to ld.  :smiley:

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## Nazrax

So I've ended up with a late night every night so far. Oh well.

It still feels like I'm clawing for memories; I miss the easy recall that I had for quite a long time. I'm trying not to stress over it, trusting that it'll come back soon. I've got my standard detailed (as far as I can remember) entries, but I haven't had the time yet to clean them up and post them. Maybe tomorrow.

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## Nazrax

And this was supposed to be a good week. Oh well, there's always next week ...

We had guests yesterday evening, and I had a little more alcohol than usual; but I'm fairly sure it was out of my system by the time we got to bed (around 10:30). My son woke us around 2AM; I felt like I had some dreams, but I couldn't remember any of them. I got back to sleep around 2:20 and woke up naturally at 6:15, 15 minutes before my wife's alarm was to go off. All I got was a fragment about my children sitting at the dining room table.

Every day this week I've told myself "that tonight will be better," but it's getting harder and harder to believe it. But tonight will be better!  :smiley:

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## NyxCC

I think it's the holiday derailment - there are too many people to see and too much food to eat. My recall has been down as well and there's an entire week to go.  ::roll::

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## Nazrax

Well, I'm back. I generally stopped worrying about DJing, and my recall came back fine  :smiley: 

For most of the break, I didn't get any lucids, but then I got one on Thursday night and another last night  :smiley: 

Thursday night's started as often happens - I have a jump cut and know that I'm dreaming, but that knowledge doesn't mean anything to me. Thankfully, my rehearsed goals kicked in and I remembered to try out a couple of RCs. I also managed to fly a tiny bit, which is still progress  :smiley:  Last night's lucidity was the rarer (for me) version in which I realized it consciously. That made recalling goals a lot easier! I still haven't experienced the "sensory overload" that almost everyone experiences - oh well, I guess we're all different.

I'd been hoping to take some time over the break to try for more WILDs; alas, due to life, I didn't really have a chance to get any more sleep than usual. I'll just keep plugging away at DILD/MILD/SSILD for now.

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## NyxCC

Welcome back and congrats on the lds!  :smiley:  I really liked the time snapshots storyline. Imagine if we could rewind like that in ld, we could accomplish tons of tasks and possibly keep the ld going for a long time. The ld hand RC was crazy too! 

Nicely done with the RCs in both lds! It was really cool that you defied all possible laws with the jump RC and interesting part at the end of the dream where people were floating around on rafts.  ::goodjob::

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## Nazrax

Yes, I was really pleased that I remembered to do my RC goals. As much as I enjoy doing the DV tasks of the month, there's something about doing stuff that's impossible in real life, yet still easy in dreams. Most of my dreams are very ordinary - I hardly ever get to do anything fun, which is part of why I really want to control them  :smiley:  Now I want to see if I can recreate the time snapshots lucidly - or, more accurately, to force a jump cut. I understand that's pretty advanced, but if my unconscious mind can do it, then my conscious mind should be able to do it too!  ::bigteeth:: 

I was really pleased with Monday night's recall. I've always assumed that when I remember loads of dreams, I'm really remembering disparate parts of a single dream but can't remember how to tie them together. With this one (as well as the "Time Snapshots" dream), I think I actually remembered all the transitions to tie them together into one big dream. Of course, the problem is I have no idea how to title a single dream that goes everywhere ...

Last night, I got to sleep late, and I got nothing. Oh well.

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## NyxCC

> Now I want to see if I can recreate the time snapshots lucidly - or, more accurately, to force a jump cut. I understand that's pretty advanced, but if my unconscious mind can do it, then my conscious mind should be able to do it too!



Go for it! A lot of the dream control ideas can come from non-lds. Even if you don't remember, you probably have done tons of things over the years. But this time snap is really unique, so even more motivation to try to do it.  :smiley: 

It's really cool you managed to tie the little pieces together into one whole dream. I think this is how our rem periods go, there's a thin or sometimes a very obvious connection between separate dreams. In addition, there might be some fading and blackouts with new scene (FA style) that interrupts the dreams, so our mind starts out with new dreams. Good job journalling and tracking the entire dream back!

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## Nazrax

I'm back!  ::D: 

Earlier in the year I was constantly tired and couldn't seem to get enough sleep, ever, so lucid dreaming wasn't really a priority. I finally seem to be over that, so I'm trying to get back into it. Thankfully, my dream recall doesn't seem to be too degraded by the couple of months off. Some mornings I haven't been able to remember anything, but as long as I can get the recall going, I get a fair bit: Thursday Friday Saturday Today

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## NyxCC

Happy to see you, Nazrax!  :smiley: 

With that awesome recall of yours, you should get back on track in no time. Sweet dreams and see you around!

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## Nazrax

I had two lucids in one night this weekend, though awareness was pretty poor in them, and I debate whether the first was really lucid or not. I have the feeling it was more of a dream about dreaming, but I'll still take it  :smiley:  I was really pleased that I remembered to really examine my environment in the second, even though I didn't have enough awareness to derail the dream.

Two more journals here and here.

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## Nazrax

Last night I woke a number of times, though thankfully I didn't have any trouble getting back to sleep. Maybe it was because it was the first time in about 2 months that I wore my dream mask. My recall wasn't bad.

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## NyxCC

Fantastic recall as always and what a better welcome back gift from your subcon than those two lds?  ::D: 

You say the first one was low awareness because you thought you were sharing a dream with a real person. Well, a lot of us here either believe or want this to be the case so much it is actually normal to take another DC to be a dreamer, especially if that DC is more lively and cooperative. You had great time with your wife and you knew you were dreaming, which is what counts.  :smiley:

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## Nazrax

Yea, I guess I was too hard on myself for that one. It was enjoyable, and I guess that's what counts  :smiley: 

I woke up a bunch last night, but my recall was still OK.

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## Nazrax

Things continue. Some nights I still feel too tired to bother with journalling, but most nights I get something (1 2 3).

Over on the DIY Novadreamer thread I've started talking to someone else who's got enough skill and interest to contribute to my efforts (and make some of his own). It still remains to be seen whether anything comes of it, but it's certainly given me a boost to be able to talk to someone about it.

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## NyxCC

Indeed, really nice you found someone passionate and capable of working with the gadget. You guys might have a great breakthrough.  ::D: 

By the way member IamCoder is working on something similar. I'm not too much in the tech part though. Here are a few related threads with some comments from him you might find useful.

http://www.dreamviews.com/lucid-aids...reamnet-2.html

http://www.dreamviews.com/research/1...ake-world.html

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## Nazrax

I finally seem to have gotten over being constantly tired, so it's about time I got back into this  :smiley:  I've been pretty consistent about journalling the last week or so, and my recall seems to be as good as it ever was (here's last night's entry). I've started back up with rereading my old entries before bed and some MILD/SSILD in the middle of the night, but no joy so far.

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## Nazrax

I was rushing to get in bed last night, since I knew I'd have an early morning this morning. I ended up with a nightmare (first in a long time), so I had a poor night with poor recall.

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## NyxCC

Nazrax! Happy to hear from you!  :smiley:  

Your poor recall is not as poor as you think, and judging by the previous entries, you are still having awesome recall despite the little break. Should be back on ld track soon. Best of luck with the practices!  :smiley:

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## Nazrax

Thanks  :smiley:  Of course, last night was even worse. As I was returning to sleep after WBTB, I tried to visualize where I wanted to be, but I suspect I got stuck into the same trap that prevents me from sleeping during and after a WILD attempt. Either I fall back asleep quickly or I don't fall back asleep at all, and I so _wish_ I had some control over that.

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## Nazrax

Woo-hoo! Last night I had my first lucid in over 6 months  :smiley:  (of course, most of that time I wasn't really trying, but still ...)

Yesterday, whenever I did a RC I tried to run through not just "am I dreaming" but "what would I do if I were dreaming;" and that may have helped. I suspect the main cause was how long I was awake during the night, that once I did fall back asleep I was more aware than I'd normally be.

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## NyxCC

What an awesome comeback! Congrats on the ld!  ::D: 

That was a truly impressive long, super detailed ld and excellent dream control on many accounts. One thing that I also liked was the continuity in the presence of the pumpkin once you came back to the shed. I like to check the dream for such things, if I turn around, will the object be still there? This can be nicely manipulated to fit one's agenda - if a negative person or item, one can forget about it and it may be gone. On the other hand, if one needs an item like you did with the pumpkin, it can still remain in the same place. 

The conversation with the DC was funny. I guess this woman was way too busy with the laundry to help. Tz tz 

At any rate, fantastic ld! Once again, congrats!  ::goodjob::

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## Nazrax

I attribute the better-than-average dream control to my actively becoming aware of the dream and not just "knowing" it after a transition. That's given me an extra spur to try to become more aware in my daily life  :smiley:  I hadn't even considered the continuity. I wonder whether it was a function of my expectation ("of course they're still there!") or of how my mind is organized. It seems it could be a problem if my dreams are too "fixed," and it does make me wonder: there have been a number of times I've tried to use expectation to summon something, and it's almost never worked  :Sad: 

For my nap yesterday, I decided to try to control my descent into sleep - I figured that if I never fell asleep, it would be a lot better than not sleeping in the middle of the night. I tried to pay attention to my breathing, but I fell asleep almost immediately anyway. Oh well.

I've gotten in the bad habit of having late nights recently, and I really need to get out of it. I still managed to have fairly good recall Saturday, Sunday, and today.

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## Nazrax

The last few days have been crazy, and I haven't had a chance to sit down to edit and post my DJs, but I'm still here. Alas, my sleep this week has been poor. I didn't sleep well Monday night and Tuesday night, and I got to sleep really late on Wednesday night. Tuesday night, while I tried to get back to sleep, I kept telling myself that I'd have a sweet lucid like the last time I had WBTB insomnia. Unfortunately, I had no such luck  :Sad:  (though I did dream about what a bad night I'd had ...)

I've continued making my "what if I were dreaming right now" visualizations more vivid. Right now I'm working on exactly how I'd find the pumpkin (I know it'd be behind me, on our dining room table), what I'd do with it, and what I'd do next. Hopefully it'll pay off when I do get another one.

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## Nazrax

I slept much better last night, and my recall was OK. I really have no idea where these school dreams are coming from, but I guess it's time to really focus on "If I'm anywhere near a high school, I'm almost certainly dreaming." I need to get back in the habit of rereading my old DJs so this stuff sticks out more in my mind.

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## Nazrax

It's been kind of a weird week, and I haven't had much chance to clean up my nightly notes into proper journal entries. At least today I managed to post last night.

My recall continues to be OK (for me, anyway), but I was excited on Saturday: I actually remembered two dreams during a camping trip!  :smiley: 

I continue my frequent RCs and "what if I were dreaming" visualizations, and I trust they'll pay off again soon ...

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